You can’t spell “bad” without “ad”
At worst, advertisements are intrusive, crass and banal. At best, they are intrusive, crass and mildly amusing.
Mariner fans were spoiled. We had commercials for the team that were quirky and cleverly written. The product of this creative well sprung forth for many years. Sadly, says the Times’ Kay McFadden, ain’t no water in the well, the creek’s run dry.
Without judging works I haven’t seen … a QVC theme? Trying to sell the team through a parody of commercialism? What’s next, a guy who makes a living by satirizing the spy serial genre getting a gig playing James Bond?
A promise: I’ll reserve judgment until the ads start airing on Saturday, but few of the spots McFadden describes sound promising.
Update: Here’s a link to the ads.
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57 Responses to “You can’t spell “bad” without “ad””
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However weird a decision that was, it’s worked out pretty well for the Bond franchise. Brosnan’s movies are generally reckoned to be good-to-excellent, and I like his portrayal of 007.
I like Brosnan, and I like his Bond movies as well. It was just the only parallel I could think of.
http://seattle.mariners.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/sea/fan_forum/commercials_2005.jsp
The Balk and The Cycle were reasonably amusing. The rest were more meh-inspiring. They were running out of ideas with the old ads though, so they had to change something.
My favorite M’s ad ever was the one in 1999 when Edgar opened the roof to safeco with a garage door opener.
And the Lowe’s home improvment one where edgar makes a lamp out of a louisville slugger is pretty sweet, too. “It’s a light bat!”
I LOL’d at The Tag — maybe just the surprise of it. Also, any ad that features Ichiro! exclaiming “Dude?!” will catch my interest.
Overall, though … this is a pretty lame series. Give me Edgar with the convertable any day!
randy winn ain’t a bad actor..
I was hoping for a Cameo from Edgar, too. Even 5 second’s of Edgar would’ve been more worth the price of admission than the combined value of the entire roster of new commercials.
As Mr Yuk would say:
#5. I agree, the grage door openr one was classic.
“Were goona play outside today”
The commericials are actually very funny. It’s cool to see them try something different and just seeing all the players is sweet.
What a miserable lot this year. It looked like Whose Line Is It Anyway done by the Conway County Community Theater.
The “Pep Talk” on was the funniest, though now I’m thinking that Boone will have a Deer-esque year at the plate.
I kind of liked the commercials, but I watch a lot of out of market coverage on the dish, and watching the commercials in other markets makes me appreciate whatever creativity they can muster. “Pep Talk” was killing me, and Ichiro saying “Dude?” was pretty funny.
“[McFadden re: the 2003 and 2004 Mariners commercials] Taken in sum, they were maudlin and a bit too transparently eager to create a sense of family that would make us forget the Mariners’ losing ways and that pricey, public-financed stadium.”
um, forget their losing ways? the ‘03-04 ads were coming off 186 wins … FWIW, McFadden has long said she would “prefer more excitement and less cuddle”:
http://archives.seattletimes.nwsource.com/cgi-bin/texis.cgi/web/vortex/display?slug=kay16&date=20040316
http://archives.seattletimes.nwsource.com/cgi-bin/texis.cgi/web/vortex/display?slug=kay14&date=20030314
Joshua Buergel said: “I watch a lot of out of market coverage on the dish, and watching the commercials in other markets makes me appreciate whatever creativity they can muster.”
the A’s had an ad last year that literally focused on female fan reaction to Mulder bending over for the resin bag…
I will admit it’s not their best work, but they aren’t awful. Pep Talk definitely stands out, and I’ll agree with #7 Randy Winn is definitely the best actor on the team. Love the Buhner cameo, but wish Edgar would’ve had one too. My all time favorite Mariners comercial is Chris Bosio the dentist. It’s a little older so people might not remember it, but it was hilarious.
Bring back Norm Norm!!!!
I didn’t like “Pep Talk,” because I don’t like any player looking or sounding smug. And you would have thought that Boone, given his smug ad last year and his resulting performance, would know better.
On the other hand, Kay McFadden absolutely gushed over Boone’s ad last year — which I think says quite a lot about Ms McFadden (if she was a guy I’d be accusing her of thinking with something other than her head). And she panned the “clapper” stadium lights ad, which was one of the better ones in that bunch (they certainly ran it more, at least until Olerud was released).
All in all, I have to say this is a particularly poor group of ads. I think it’s especially risky to have none of them take place in or around the stadium. You’re getting pretty far removed from the product, which is the actual game of baseball. Focusing on the personalities has worked for the Mariners in the past; but without the dependably loveable Edgar it’s more difficult, and that’s compounded because many of the most important or recognizable faces aren’t working in their native language. I’d also argue they didn’t do a very good job of introducing their most expensive, and most important, new additions: the Sexson/Beltre ad seems particularly flat. That ad perhaps did the best it could within the Shopping Network format, but that just argues the format is part of the problem. And they need to build a connection to these guys for the casual fan, because they’re going to be around for a while and the last of the old dependables — Moyer and Wilson — are going to be gone. From a charisma / screen presence point of view (and looking towards that A’s Mulder ad), Pinero is a good bet: I know a couple of women who go weak in the knees when they hear him talk on the radio. Olivio looks like he could be a star, even if he can’t deliver lines and can only grin at the camera. Sexson and Ichiro would have been a fun pairing — Richie is what, more than a foot taller? But these guys are athletes — having them mostly sit at desks and talk to the camera just isn’t very fun or exciting.
All in all, not a very good effort. I imagine next year’s will be better, if only because the key players are better-known and there are familiar idiosyncracies to build ads around.
But at least we got to hear Ichiro say “Dude!”
I’d say at best they are mildly funny, pep talk is the best, but well below the Ms previous standards, still probably much better than what most teams get, but we have been spoiled.
My all time favorite is probably casual fridays, but so many are great it is hard to choose.
I think using the QVC format for all the spots was a mistake, they are all too much alike. Maybe they should have spoofed TV in general, they could have done a QVC spot, somehting like Trading Spaces, Reality TV shows, American Idol and so on.
wow – they’re not THAT bad people…
granted, we all love gar and his little accent – but can you name even like two other commercials from each of the past 5-10 years? probably not…
they did good with “the cycle”, “batter’s box”, “three pitches” (although it felt like they missed a few really easy punchlines there), and definately “pep talk” (that one felt like it could have been a lot longer – too bad they all have to be 30 second spots)…
something i think all of us can agree on:
Boonie and Buhner are still the best and don’t even seem like they have to try…
Ichiro, Wilson, Ibanez, Winn, Moyer, and Mads are good, but need clever lines to be even remotely funny…
And everyone else better pray they play a whole lot better than they act – especially sexson – wow! that was horrible!;)
also – anyone else feel like pokey’s spot is one that might get edited out soon? just curious… not that it’s a big loss or anything, just kinda surprised that they’d throw him in with the big guys and risk having to tank that commercial if/when reese begins to tank… (anyone notice the lack of aurilla/cirillo/olerude commercials after they were jettisoned from the team – or simply fell of the face of the acknowledgeable earth? that’s kinda where the thought comes from)
2nd also – where’s sandfrog!
you think,.. maybe?…. (please!!!)
Pep talk was the best, but none of em are particularly memorable. I think it’s time to put the whole “you gotta love these guys” marketing concept to bed, really. I’m just loath to see the whole Cubs-esque lovable losers thing set in here. The 95 team is over … other than Wilson none of those guys are left. Why not try to market these guys as a bunch of badasses, or at least as baseball players and not sucka pitchmen for QVC crap????
I liked the Simpson’s reference in the article – the toothpick skyscraper and escalator to nowhere.. and especially relevant to Seattle because of course that was the monorail episode! (“Nawww… it’s more of a Shelbyville idea”)
Xteve X said:
“Why not try to market these guys as a bunch of badasses”
so, you want fiction, huh…
I have seen these ads.
I know this will sound a bit too idealistic (however I am an idealist, so I don’t care), but the ‘fun’ of depicting the Mariners as a soul-less, low-brow, commercial entity quickly dissolves into the ‘realization’ that it is in fact accurate (in some ways, more than any other franchise). The already thin verneer of denial which exists to help us pretend the game retains a noble aspect (even purpose) begins peeling away at the corners.
Major League Baseball…QVC?
Imagine if ABC tried to market sit-coms as worthless and vapid, even detrimental to the intellect?
Perhaps it would have been better (more fun, and finally more effective) not to get so close to awful truth.
I’ve gotta go with Ichiro saying ‘Dude’, just something timeless about that one.
Still, my all-time favorite M’s add had Moyer and the Moose sharing a hotel room. Who knew the Moose was such a pig, or that Jamie had such good comic chops.
I thought they were pretty funny. Not the best season for Mariner adds but they do what they should. They make you watch them the first couple of times and then they are easy to glance over when its half way through the season and you’ve seen them all a hundred times.
Still some of the best I’ve ever seen in baseball. Most team’s adds are horrible.
Milorad V:
You would be interested to read my article on the Morsels blog. Click my name to go there.
I am sorry for the plug, as my co-author has been chastized in the past for such shameless linking to our blog, but I feel this post goes right along with the theme of the new M’s commercials.
Chastized?
I’ve asked people in the past to please not plug themselves, especially not repeatedly, especially not after they’ve been asked not to do so.
Come on now.
#27:
Meant facetiously, of course. My gratitude to you for allowing me one plug before pulling it on me (so to speak.)
Go gently, DMZ, this is his first offense.
Had that lump in my head not cropped up by the very thought of even linking to an article I didn’t write (but host on my blog) in fear of being “thorped” again, I would’ve suggested others read it here, too.
Now we know what Corco feels like
I haven’t seen the new M’s ads, but the ad for the auto glass company with Jamie Moyer firing a brick through a truck windshield is funny in a dumb way.
Now we know what Corco feels like
I don’t think that anyone but Mr. Corcoran knows that.
granted, we all love gar and his little accent – but can you name even like two other commercials from each of the past 5-10 years?
well, let’s try.
-the hardware commercials with randy johnson living in the store.
-those shaving cream pie commercials (with norm?)
-bone’s shiny scalp blinding the batter.
-why is abbreviation such a long word? if a cow laughs, will milk come out its nose?
-buffalo wings and sauce relatec antics.
-kaz and rhodes fighting with a vending machine.
-three muskateers in the bullpen.
and of course all the commercials already mentioned.
what other commercials (that were all better than this year) can we remember?
i just remembered another.
cammy, and booney, and shiggy, and… winny?
These ads are particularly bad for several reasons. First of all , they do not sell the product. Secondly, they do not educate the consumer, and thirdly, they do not entertain.
Honestly what were they trying to do this year with the QVC theme? It certainly didn’t expose any player personalities like the ads of yesteryear. They weren’t seriously trying to tell you anything about the team (90% of the viewers probably don’t even know what Beltre, Sexson, Reese, Meche, Reed or Olivo look like), nor were they selling the product of baseball.
All in all, they are a very poor collection of ads and reflect poorly on both the agency and the Mariners.
how about the one where Edgar ordered pizza from the bullpen phone ? “Yes, we have a coupon…”
Anything where Edgar talks is funny.
that’s what i’m saying… edgar is funny, but kind of in that whole splinter from the teenage mutant ninja turtles movie sort of way when he (splinter) says “i made a funny!” and then in #2, when he says “i made another funny!”
you’ll only know what i mean if you’ve seen those movies…
also – i may not have phrased it right, but what i meant by the whole “can you even name like two other commercials from the past 5-10 years” was:
can you name two other commercials besides the big one for that year or one with edgar? probably not… this year’s crop isn’t that different, that’s all i’m trying to say.
some are good, and some are god-aweful bad.
i think this might be fun – does anyone wants to participate in a little mariners razzies: what’s your vote for the worst m’s comercial in the last 10 years? now that’s a tough one….
my vote goes for the one where cammy almost got hit by the asteroid, that was just weird…
for the record, my fav is either the one where jay is hitting flies or edgar’s “that’s just not right” but to each their own…
To name a few more classics:
-The Ichiro spoof of the Tiger Woods Nike add, “not bad, huh?”
-Buhner and the fly “eh, looks like I topped it”
-Moyer’s incredibly slow change-up with Wilson distracting the batter
-Moyer and the radar gun in KPH (if you’ve seen the outtakes, there are about 3 of him trying to say “Sacre Bleu” and failing miserably. He ended up saying “Oo La La” in the final version)
I too LOLed at Olivo’s bit in “the Tag” and found “Pep Talk” to be the best of the lot, but on the whole, this batch isn’t nearly as funny as those of past years.
I don’t like the QVC format, but I did laugh at most of ads. Olivo tagging the unsuspecting guy on the street and Hargrove’s dead pan “pep talk” were pretty funny.
Still, my reaction is to turn on QVC/HSN and see what’s for sale, not to buy Mariners tickets. I can’t say we’ll remember these the way we do many past “classics”.
Morisseau said: “how about the one where Edgar ordered pizza from the bullpen phone ? “Yes, we have a coupon…â€
according to Jimmy Copacino, that was an ad-lib by Edgar….
I must not be sophisticated enough. I love ‘em. Not the best batch ever, but they put a smile on my face.
They started out poorly, and either I just got used to them, or they got better, but I liked them as I go to the last two. I thought the Balk was pretty clever (I like absurdist humour), and the Pep Talk was excellent both because of Grover’s wonderful comic delivery, and that the ad made fun of Boone while he was right there.
Have we all forgotten Lee Elia’s star turn with Edgar? “Oh my, Edgar, you look great.” “Uh, I’m getting pretty tired here, coach.” This one was genius because it played on characters (Lee and Gar) and the actual game. The fact that a hitting coach could play cards while Gar was taking BP and then congratulate himself (“Hey, we’re pretty good coaches, aren’t we?”) was everything you could want in an ad for a ball club: good characters and great baseball, at least a great hitter. That was probably one of the best of a great vintage crop of ads.
Not that I have nothing to do but remember old M’s ads,….y’know…
How about that old Mary Tyler Moore spoof featuring Freddy Garcia. That was a pretty dumb commercial, but at least it was more creative than the collective garbage that they’re trying to sell us this year…
And I have to remind you all of the scary campfire stories Moyer and Wilson are telling the rookies about the guy who knows what you’re going to throw before you even know …
There was only one moment in the commercials I really liked. The moment in Pep Talk where the guy feels like he could strike out Boone
Of course, that’s only because I’m already imagining drunk guys yelling out “That’s not saying much, my grandmother feels like she could strike out Boone too!” every time the commercial plays.
That they are all QVC-spoofs is a contrast from the variety of years past, and I actually think these commercials show very little about the players–most roles in these commercials would be interchangeable between players. Many of the “favorites” mentioned above make player-specific references (e.g. Jamie Moyer change-up, Scary campfire story, Buhner’s shiny head, Lou’s asteroid gut instinct).
Color me suprised that “Three pitches” hasn’t gotten more raves, because that’s the only one I laughed at.
Honestly,
A homestarrunner.com cartoon could’ve sold the baseball product better than those commercials.
These commercials were kind of bland.
What they should’ve done is only have one or 2 of those QVC ads, 3 of the classic SODO MOJO ads, and 1 ad saluting the ‘95 Mariners since it’s the 10th Anniversery of that team, and they’ll have some promotions surrounding that team this year.
This really stinks, normally these commercials are creative and funny.
But this year, it was just bad. And the way the players talked, so flippin’ corny.
Good call on the Freddy Garcia/Mary Tyler Moore spoof. That one was very clever.
For my money, the all-time classic remains “I took my geoduck to Puyallup…”
I glad that they didn’t use Snelling or Reese in “The Tag” with Wilson because of Wilson punching Winn on the shoulder. If it were Snelling or Reese, someone would have suffered an arm injury. I guess I’m really glad they didn’t use Sexson, Gil, or Jo-el there either…need to leave their shoulders alone.
Personally, I love Sexson’s delivery in “The Long Ball.” It reminds me of some overrelaxed, jolly weatherman. Especially when he says “Now this next item is a real crowd-pleaser” and “Pokey, the stolen base is in the next hour…this is the long ball.” And then the long panout angle when Pokey mumbles “oops.” Hahaha.
And Ichiro saying “I hit singles in mine, all the time” and Raul saying “oh yes you do, Ichiro, yes you do.” Hahaha.
The commercials were hilarious, however nobody gets hurt in em. sorry. My favorite would have to be the Boonie one. I like to see Boone in another cocky commercial, that guy is crazy to think he is gonna strike out the 2005 MVP.
IMO, the main downfall of this year’s commercials is that they’re all of the same theme. Realistically I think it’s safe to say we’ll all have different takes on whether we like particular commercials or not. This holds true for all the commercials in years past as well, with a lot of us remember some of the better regarded ones and perhaps forget about the lesser. In the past the commercials had enough variety among them, so that there’d bound to be a few memorable ones. After watching this year’s batch, however, it made me feel like all of them was one product as a whole. They all looked basically the same, and that added to the bland feel overall.
At times I even felt like the commercials were equalling the viewers with the supposed studio audience…. “We said a funny line. Hear the audience laugh? You’re supposed to too!” Perhaps that’s why I found the only spots that went outside of the studio setting amusing: the Olivo tag, the Hargrove video, the bullpen phone ringing, and Buhner’s cameo even. There might’ve also been a few countable lines that were quite funny (Ichiro: I hit singles in mine — all the time!), but they were offset by the lifeless atmosphere the rest of the way. Overall, the QVC theme was truly a bad idea, and that alone was enough to make the commercials terrible.
One can say we’ve been spoiled by the higher quality commercials the M’s offered in the past, but even without making comparisons, this year’s commercials were bad in their own right.
Wow. I can’t believe anyone finds anything complimentary to say about those ads. OK – one compliment, to the actors. The acting is now finally better than the scripting. Those things looked like something a bunch of 12 year olds in a garage with their parents’ video camera would come up with. How disappointing.
jeez, i’d hate to imagine this lot in a room talking about the good ol’ high school days — “things just aren’t as great as they were back then”, “i sure miss emilio and his adorable accent”, “if only things didn’t change so much every year”.
was this forum here last year? and the year before? i’m betting the commercial reviews were just as negative and that everyone bemoaned the travesty of how much better the spots were the year before.
etc etc etc, blah blah blah.
was this forum here last year? and the year before? i’m betting the commercial reviews were just as negative and that everyone bemoaned the travesty of how much better the spots were the year before.
You’re totally unaware of the history of the site and unwilling to look for answers, and yet willing to dismiss everyone’s opinion as some kind of looped chorus of complaints.
Nice.
I took a look at yesteryears’ spots after seeing the 2005 batch and, yeah, the ad concepts (highlighting players’ personalities in and out of comedic baseball situations), for the most part, played much funnier and more personable than this year’s.
But these one’s aren’t THAT bad. Maybe it’s the idea that the concept is so different this time around? Or that the players are put in the completely unreal situation of trying to ’sell’ baseball? Or that we don’t want to see players in an environment outside of what they’re paid millions to do? Or maybe we, the fans, are having a tough time seeing all the M’s stalwarts move on to other pastures?
The Mariners are unusual in the league, and probably in the sporting world in general, in that they put so much thought and effort behind their TV advertisement. It seems that sports franchises have no interest in promoting their teams other than huge billboards with logos & players’ faces (which they usually pay for by putting a NIKE logo on it), or just advertising when the next game will be televised. To me, it’s refreshing to see the M’s marketing folks & executives continuing to push the envelope year after year with their TV campaigns.
That said, I’m curious about next year’s commercials — will they try another new concept or will they return to the concept that worked so well for so many years… now THAT is a good idea for a blog thread (IMHO of course).
for dmz (post #54):
i have only google to thank for my knowledge of this website. i have not the desire, time or patience to search, scroll or click through this site in the quest for a history of what else has been discussed, accomplished or covered here.
my comments were made upon reading over 50 posts by, i assume, “regulars” to this forum. my questions were rhetorical. and you know what? your description of the forum as a ‘looped chorus of complaints’, with a few exceptions, hits the nail squarely on the head.
oops! your 15 minutes is up. visited history erased.
So wait.
You came here through Google.
You read a thread where 50 people posted about not liking, in general, this year’s ads, but where many people posted about how much they liked past years.
You assumed that in previous years, people had complained about the ads, though you can clearly see that people liked them.
Your question wasn’t rhetorical. You asked specifically how long we’d been around while getting around to your crack about how everyone’s constantly complaining, though you’ve got no evidence of that or –
I don’t understand how you got from the thread’s “this year’s ads are pretty bad, boy, the old ads were good” to having such a low opinion.