Moyer
You know the three true outcomes. Well, here are the three noble truths of the baseball season in late April: it’s early, it’s early, it’s early.
Sportsline’s Scott Miller profiles Jamie Moyer today, and don’t they say that old people are supposed to be wise? He preaches just that gospel.
Moyer comes off much as you’d expect: cerebral, straightforward, humble. He’s quick to point out that we can’t draw firm conclusions about where the season is headed yet, especially as regards his own performance. Bonus points are awarded for pithy points like this:
“I’ve only pitched in five games this season,” Moyer says. “You haven’t given me a chance to give up 44 home runs in five games.”
Classic.
We also have a clubhouse leader for the Tom Friedman Award in Nonsensical Metaphor. Quoth Miller:
Granted, if you look at the season like an M&M, we haven’t even broken the candy coating yet.
Really, who doesn’t look at the season like an M&M? What, is Miller taking an Amstrong Williams style payoff from the Mars company?
Comments
23 Responses to “Moyer”
And yes, I know that “like” makes the M&M comparison a simile, not a metaphor. The Friedman Award is all-encompassing in its guidelines.
Of course he also says the only thing keeping Bavasi from straight A’s was his failure to sign Carl Pavano so…
Actually, a simile is a type of metaphor. You’re off the hook, Jeff.
This message has been brought to you by your friendly local English teacher. The passive voice is used in all our announcements.
Jeff:
Are you referring to Thomas Friedman of the Old York Times?
The very same, Christian. Tom “I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express last night in Afghanistan, so the world is flat” Friedman.
so are you more of the conservative persuasion like myself?
let’s nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot go down this road, shall we?
In the interests of keeping the baseball blog blessedly free of political discussion, I’ll just say we represent a diverse array of perspectives, and that I will generally make fun of anyone I think is silly.
So make fun of Miller. That M&M thing is nothing if not silly.
And Miller left out any mention of the notebook Moyer keeps on all the hitters he faces. That’s gotta help his success.
Granted, if you look at the season like a Heathcliff Slocumb appearance, we haven’t even thrown a strike yet.
sorry guys I regretted asking about politics as soon as I saw it up on the screen
The M&M thing is completely silly. I mean c’mon it’s really more complex than that, like a Babe Ruth……..right?
#13– yah, layered, you know… like an onion. or a Baby Ruth.
Non-Moyer link– “Lou Piniella has forgotten more baseball than Curt Schilling knows? Here’s the top 10 list of things he can’t remember.”
from Jim Caple:
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=caple/piniella/050429
Did Miller put in a link to M&M’s dot com like you? Maybe YOU are the one getting paid off…
you know, those new Dare To Go To The Dark Side m&ms are pretty darned good….
I was just so impressed that someone would devote such an extensive and complex website to colorful sugary lumps that I had to include a link.
Pay no attention to the chocolate-flavored check I am currently eating. Mmmm, payolicious …
Glad to see this thread still has a pulse. Here’s the worst comment from the Miller piece:
“You can understand why ambitious, shooting-star talents such as Johnson position themselves to play with a winner year in and year out.”
And I thought The Big Unit just took the money.
I think I have a cyber crush on Jeff. Once again, his witty style has me chuckling to myself. Why did I click on the Mars link? I just had to, I don’t know why.
This is off-topic, but have there ever been so many Cy Young Awards starting in one night before?
Woooohoooo! I get to see King Felix for the first time tonight!
How timely: One day after the article, Jamie delivers his worst start of the season.