Barry Bonds is coming to Seattle
Tomorrow, yes, but could the petulant slugger be bringing his size XL melon to Safeco next year as well? San Francisco media reports indicate that it’s a possibility:
During a 10-minute chat initiated by two Seattle writers, Barry Bonds said he might be interested in playing for the Mariners next year. “If they’re looking for a DH, it could be,” he said.
First thought? Much ado about nothing, speculation stirred up by a couple of bored reporters. Not that I blame them. I’m all for throwing rocks at the hornet nest, especially as regards scurrilous rumor-mongering.
Bonds also reiterated how serene he is now. “That’s probably bad for me because normally when I’m an a — , I function better,” he said. “Right now, I’m having a great time with the guys, enjoying life. I may not be the ballplayer I once was, but I’m a lot happier.”
Temtping as it is to let this pass without comment, this implies a facetious five-point action plan:
Step 1: Sign Bonds
Step 2: Piss him off
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Repeat step 2
Step 5: Profit!
Comments
70 Responses to “Barry Bonds is coming to Seattle”
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Step 1: Get underpants
Step 2: ???
Step 3: Profit!
On a serious note I’d be all for Barry on the M’s.
No way trhat guy’s better than WFB
I have made the special trip to Seattle just to boo Barry Bonds.
Boo.
That’s a hilarious plan.
It seems like the Royals would be in the best position to execute this plan, though. Just putting Bonds in that lineup would be guaranteed to anger him.
I really go back and forth on this. I got wind of the (however remote) possibility of the M’s being interested in trading for Barry Bonds before this season, and at first I lambasted the idea.
Still, the dude can hit. I will say that 50% of Barry Bonds is still better than 100% of darn near anyone the M’s either have currently in their system (or any other guy that would be available to the M’s in the offseason). And, in spite of its negative potential, it would bring much-needed attention back to the team. Like you said — attention = profits, no matter what kind of attention.
I’m not 100% opposed to Barry Bonds wearing an M’s uniform. Would it cause me some serious conflict as an M’s fan? Absolutely! But, it would show me a whole heck of a lot about Howard Lincoln specifically for him to allow it to happen. And you know he’d have to give it his thumbs-up!
This is, of course, completely ignoring the likelihood of it happening. I’m just saying that if it were even remotely possible, I wouldn’t be 100% opposed to it.
Barry Bonds in a M’s uniform will guarantee he doesn’t pass Aaron.
Seriously, when was the last time a former Giant contributed to an M’s season? Bonds is like an older, slower, worse fielding Kevin Mitchell.
That being said, I’d take bonds over mitchell.
possibly.
meh
Hmmmmmm. Another washed up slugger from the National League? Sign me up!
Bonds’ 2007 line would be something like .228/.574/.510 …
Have to admit the rest of the country would be paying attention to the M’s. San Fran would be bitching and moaning, the rest of the country would be hoping that he hits .208 and get’s DFA’d before the trade deadline.
A washed up slugger whose OPS (.970) is higher than any of our current starters…
his OPS could be 2.0, it wouldn’t matter if he could only stager to the plate once every 10 days.
11 – Well over .100 points higher, I might add.
DH only, lefty… I’m all for it on a one year deal.
He’s played 50 games so far this year. DH’ing should take a much less sever toll on him. I think you could pencil him in for 130 or 140, which would make him incredibly valuable.
I would not want Bonds in an M’s uniform, and I do not think his presence would help sell enough additional tickets to justify the headache he will bring.
Remember that he testified to a Grand Jury with complete immunity except for his promise to tell the truth. According to the leaked testimony from the grand jury, as reported in the recent book by the Chronicle reporters, he did not tell the truth. That is called perjury, and it is a felony. You usually get jail time for that offense (Little Kim is in the joint right now) and you can not hit too many home runs from inside prison.
Just what we need another .228 hitter.
Seriously, I’d take the guy in a heartbeat. He’s better than any hitter we have right now. Even washed up, he’s better than Everett or Ibanez.
I’d love to see Bonds on the M’s. Sign me up.
He could split time at DH with Doyle.
DH only, lefty… I’m all for it on a one year deal.
Nope. He’d want $Texas, and basically, he’s Carl Everett with a better bat, but with more injuries and baggage. Pass.
While I agree that Bonds is probably mostly washed up, 50% of Bonds is probably TWICE what Everett + Ibanez would be next year.
On a one-year deal, I’d sign him. It’d be a tough decision, but I’d probably do it.
But I expect him to end up with the LALALALA Angels.
It’s tough to prove perjury, rcc. You’d need to demonstrate that Bonds knew he was lying at the time. He never claimed he didn’t use anything – he claimed he didn’t know for sure what he was using. If he was smart enough to maintain some plausible deniability, he’s free and clear.
I’m also a staunch opponent of the non-analytic positive. Rules need to have very clear definitions of how they’ll be enforced. For an example, check out the Formula One Technical Regulations (pdf).
I think Bonds has decided he’ll throw out any old factoid, or go along with anything proposed by the media, as long as the “S” word is not involved. Any kind of interest or controversy on any other topic means fewer questions about cream and clear, perjury and indictments.
Bonds’ family is in SoCal. His history is in the Bay Area. If he decides to DH (and really, given the apparent condition of his legs its the only reasonable way he can continue to chase Aaron, if he wants to stay in baseball at all) I would think his only choices are the A’s and the Angels. I doubt he’d be willing to take the kind of pay Beane thinks he’s actually worth as a statistical entity, but as a marquee draw in the Bay Area he might be big enough that the A’s would be willing to pay him the “non-insulting” amount he’d demand.
My money’s on the Angels, however. Moreno’s shown he’s willing to pay money and take risks, and the results this year have been pretty disappointing — a Big Bat with a Big Name might be just what he’s looking for in the off-season.
Personally, I hope Barry just retires. I don’t give a damn about him passing Ruth, but I cringe at the thought of him eclipsing a legitimately great player/person like Aaron.
I just can’t many people being willing to pay Barry what he is likely to want, IF he is healthy, IF he isn’t in any Federal trouble from perjury to taxes…. FWIW, Jim Moore was also down in Az, following Bonds around:
“Then it happened. He moved from the couch to his locker, and two Seattle reporters moved in, hoping to break the ice with a couple of softball questions about playing at Safeco Field this weekend.
Bonds played there in July 2001, just before the All-Star Game. Asked what he remembered about that series with the Mariners, Bonds said: “I had a good time … I enjoy being on the field and DH-ing.”
Asked if the Mariners are a team he’d like to join after his contract ends this season, Bonds said: “Could be, could be. If they’re looking for a DH, could be.”
The Giants’ beat writers joined in, asking him questions about Tuesday night’s game. He is wearing a “girdle” to protect his sore side, and he said his knee is feeling better because he’s lost weight.”
Didn’t Babe Ruth drink during Prohibition? Don’t know if he bought any rounds for his friends, but if he did, he was a supplier and a Felon! Plus, given Ruth’s performance, one might argue that for him liquor was a performance enhancing drug.
George Steinbrenner . . . Wasn’t his conviction a felony? He was responsible for a lot of those recent Yankee World Series rings, in that he popped for the cash to fund the teams with all-stars, so shall we remove those Yankee teams from the records because the players were complicit when they chose to play for a known felon?
And Ty Cobb was a bigot so let’s remove those records, and Frank Robinson got caught with a gun that he shouldn’t have had–just a misdemeanor, but still . . .
Pete Rose — might not some of those hits have come when Cincinatti was behind, and he got those hits for the sole purpose of beating the spread? Sure, let’s remove those records too.
Two points:
(1) there’s a lot of a-holes in the Hall of Fame.
(2) Let’s not punish a person for a crime until he or she is actually convicted.
Chances are slim the Mariners will have a chance at Bonds but, if they do, unless his triceps explode or something, sign him up. .950 or .900 or even .850 would look good on the M’s right now.
Oh and by the way, sorry about the Zumwalt for Zumsteg howler the other day.
+ Remember that he testified to a Grand Jury with complete immunity except for his promise to tell the truth. +
Anyone who thinks that you get jail time for not telling the truth to a Grand Jury simply hasn’t been paying attention recently
(Which would, unfortunately, be true for big names from both parties as well as for stars of all sports.)
I’d sign Bonds. Like his main competitor for best LF of the past 50 years (Ricky), he’d both be worth the price of admission and would contribute to winning baseball games.
If Ted Williams could manage, is it possible Barry would be able to be a hitting coach post-career?
RCC said:Remember that he testified to a Grand Jury with complete immunity except for his promise to tell the truth. According to the leaked testimony from the grand jury, as reported in the recent book by the Chronicle reporters, he did not tell the truth. That is called perjury, and it is a felony. You usually get jail time for that offense (Little Kim is in the joint right now) and you can not hit too many home runs from inside prison.
You are forgetting that Lil’ Kim is black. As much as America dislikes Bonds, he’s not going to jail anytime soon.
If we presume that Bonds:
a) wants to be a DH on a team that will have an opening for one;
b) wants to stay on the West Coast; and
c) wants a short porch in right field
I’d say the Mariners may just be the best fit for him, over the A’s and Angels.
I just don’t think Bonds will want to sign a 1-year deal, old stars like that are always looking to get years on that contract. As great as he is, and as much as I would love him DHing for us (although I hate his guts), I don’t think it would work out financially.
Simply put, the organization won’t have a lot of credibility as seriously dealing with the problem of performance enhancers in baseball if, 12 months after a season where they led the major leagues in number of steroid suspensions, they sign the poster boy for BALCO to a contract.
That in and of itself will be why it won’t happen, but I’ll add that I also think the Commissioner’s office will very quietly discourage anyone from signing Bonds (possibly loudly if the Mitchell report comes back with very damning evidence, like the Dowd report), because of the obvious reasons… and as the draft showed us, the M’s aren’t interested in crossing Seligula.
If Bonds is in a realistic position to hit No. 755 in 2007, I think a lot of teams would buck Seligula in order to be the host for the historic hoopla — correctly reasoning that if Seligula had enough evidence to kick Bonds out of the game, he’d just kick Bonds out of the game.
Short of that, all the commish has is bluster.
25 –
1. Who cares about prohibition. It was a bad law. If Bonds was breaking a bad law, few would care.
2. Unless Rose was tanking to win bets, I’m not calling for the headsman.
3. If Ty Cobb played today, I wouldn’t want him anywhere near my team… and he would be widely loathed. He’d make the Rocker hate seem like puppy love.
I think the point was not that Bonds is a felon, stone him. We can all agree that there are worse humans as athletes. The point is that the feds really seem to have it in for Bonds, not saying not for good reasons, and he is no good to anyone if he is in prison.
As far as the “convicted” part… well, I’m not going to let OJ Simpson date my sister anytime soon.
Do I think he should be formally punished before he’s convicted? No. Do I think I can make some educated conclusions and base my opinion of him off of those? Yes.
If Bonds is in a realistic position to hit No. 755 in 2007, I think a lot of teams would buck Seligula in order to be the host for the historic hoopla — correctly reasoning that if Seligula had enough evidence to kick Bonds out of the game, he’d just kick Bonds out of the game.
SF? Sure. Bonds isn’t liked anywhere else. Interesting data point: the Giants don’t lead MLB, or even the NL, in road attendance. I’m not convinced he draws fans to the park outside of the ones in SF- he doesn’t really seem to be more of a draw than the Brewers or D’Backs are.
Also, I’m not sure a team that’s tanking their attendance wants to sign someone who’s hugely controversial and could give them unprecedented pains in the ass (like a player playing under indictment) that pale behind any Carl Everett might give them.
Finally, some historical context: the last two career home run champs finished out their careers in different leagues (Aaron was even a DH). They didn’t make the kind of impact that their teams had hoped- Ruth washed out of the league before June, and Aaron had OPS’s of .687 and .684.
Lawton… Morse… Franklin… Bonds.
A trend?
Can we bring Jose Canseco back out of retirement too?
I wouldn’t mind seeing Bonds hitting 4th for us, but at the salary he’ll want, no thanks.
Rafael Palmeiro is also available.
Oh, that’s right.
I could make a bad Ken Caminiti joke but I’ve already gone too far.
#27 You are forgetting that Lil’ Kim is black. As much as America dislikes Bonds, he’s not going to jail anytime soon.
HUH??
That’s the best double-take I’ve had in weeks.
What is your point?
If you think Carl Everett has a few, err, personality quirks, he’s a Sister of Mercy next to Barry. But this is well known. I can’t get excited about renting a year of Barry.
OH, and by the way bookbook, if you are confident nobody does time for Grand Jury perjury, give it a shot. Better keep your fingers crossed. And ask Chris Webber for his views on the topic.
Or Alger Hiss.
“Who cares about prohibition. It was a bad law. If Bonds was breaking a bad law, few would care.” — uh oh. major can of worms there. avoiding the whole debate about what makes a law good or bad entirely, i’ll say this:
few care anyway. I admit many casual baseball fans and some die hards care; i would even grudgingly admit that if you do a ton of “idiot on the street” interviews, many would dispense blowhard anti-bonds beliefs as fast as the current administration dispenses no-bid contracts to their old cronies.
However most these individuals would likely not know any significant fact about Bonds’ talent outside “he hits homeruns, and everybody [i]knows[/i] he is on steroids. These people wouldn’t be able to tell you what team Albert Pujols currently plays for or how his name is pronounced.
These same people– including many “true fans” are very willing to lynch Bonds today, yet have no interest or knowlege of who Pujols personal trainer also trains, and the interesting though completely unproven potential for connecting the dots.
And yet, despite all this, let’s not forget, there are thousands– perhaps millions– of americans who really could care less about Bonds’ percieved or implied crimes. From those who hate baseball/sports in general, to those that left interest in the game years ago, to those that know steroid investigations in baseball are like taking the rust off the body of a classic car that spent most its life in the midwest– be careful chipping rust off or you may not have any body left.
There is a wealth of half proven (at best) hearsay and a logically lean argument about how (apparently only the evil) Bonds should be banned from the planet and forced into excile in some leper colony on the moon. And perhaps he did commit a crime or three– let he who hasn’t committed a crime (of lying to a grand jury) caste the first stone.
According to Grimsley, the Feds (i.e. the current administration) were specifically after Bonds. I find that rather absurd given the current events.
I don’t care that anyone connected to the current administration may or may not have lied to a grand jury (or the american public), and I don’t care if Bonds did. The prez needs to be the best prez he can be, and Bonds needs to keep hitting home runs and being the greatest player I’ve ever seen hit a baseball.
Can he still do it? Better than 3/4’s the league. Would I be thrilled to see him in Seattle? Are you F*#@ing kidding?!?! Carl Everett people, Carl Everett.
I’d rather have Alger Hiss … a venerated, vilified veteran lefty.
If we’re just going on personality i’ll take the politically charged cheater over the insane gay bashing young earther any day. At least Barry Bonds has some interesting stuff to say about race relations. And i just can’t stomach bad epistemology in the media.
But what do we really know about epistemology in the media?
Sorry, I meant Carl Everett’s gems like “if no human has seen it then there is no reason to believe that it existed” Amongst the things which apparently don’t exist are electrons, dinosaurs, electromagnetic fields, the economy, and suprisingly, God.
(smug mode engaged)
Going to the game, to see Barry Bonds.
On Saturday, in very good seats.
To see King Felix, too.
For FREE (thanks to a ticketing snafu with the last game I went to).
Sometimes, life is not so bad.
(smug mode disengaged)
32 – This is also a bad law, and thus I don’t care that Bonds might be breaking it.
In response to #38, you’re right some people do go to jail for Grand Jury perjury.
I found it ironic that the day after Karl Rove was assured he would not be prosecuted for failing to tell the truth to the Grand Jury (I won’t go so far as to say it was perjury) that a post assumed that not disclosing the full truth to the Grand Jury was going to land Bonds in jail. As someone else posted here, perjury is a tough charge to make stick. Prosecutors often won’t try.
I don’t believe Bonds will do jail time. And I don’t believe that has anything to do with the color of his skin.
Bonds is a fascinating character. One thing: I don’t think he’s been reviled by his teammates, Jeff Kent excepted. If Lou were still manager, I imagine they’d actually work well together.
all you have to do to see how much barry bonds is liked by his teammates is look at the clips of his significant homeruns–his 600th? he had to celebrate with the bat girl. his 715th? he paraded around the field alone. David Ortiz hits a 4th inning home run against the devil rays and his teammates storm him like he just cured cancer. So don’t tell me that they actually like him. Kent’s just one of the few people that has been man enough to stand up to him.b
Getting back to the big spread on the front of the Times Sports Section. Did you notice there was no story NO STORY about the Ms on the front page? Not the FRONT front page, but the front page of the dang Sports Section.
The story was about Barry, which was right. He is a story. The Seattle team is not, or certainly not a front-pager.
This speaks to whether or not Barry would be a good acquisition for this team. I say not, because if there ever was a franchise that must begin rebuilding from the ground up, starting probably today, it is our home town nine. That means up and comers and get the Farm System fixed, and decline the honor of investing millions – even for a single season – in a player who is plunging ever more deeply into the twilight of an ethically questionable career. (And I think “ethically questionable” is giving him the benefit of the doubt.)
That probably means a new GM, since Mr. Bavasi has not exhibited the sort of talent to get this done, and he has had ample opportunity to do so.
I’ve said it before… to the thoughts of Bonds becoming a Mariner I say HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA….
You wouldn’t actually laugh, you’d say that? That seems hollow and false.
Well, it reads more expressively than ::uproarious laughter::
I think Gomez was lifting Mandark’s laugh.
#40 – “However most these individuals would likely not know any significant fact about Bonds’ talent outside “he hits homeruns, and everybody [i]knows[/i] he is on steroids. These people wouldn’t be able to tell you what team Albert Pujols currently plays for or how his name is pronounced.”
I wouldn’t make the mistake of assuming that those that disagree with you must be ignorant. Because you’d be wrong at least as often as if you assumed all pro-Bonds people do or do not know all the facts.
Not sure why I should care how much of the general public hates/loves Bonds anyway. Doesn’t impact my opinion either way. Certainly proves nothing to me.
“I don’t care that anyone connected to the current administration may or may not have lied to a grand jury (or the american public), and I don’t care if Bonds did. The prez needs to be the best prez he can be, and Bonds needs to keep hitting home runs and being the greatest player I’ve ever seen hit a baseball.”
I should have read ahead because this statement is so inexplicable to me that we probably don’t even have ground for discussion.
#46 – “This is also a bad law, and thus I don’t care that Bonds might be breaking it.”
Obviously a valid opinion, but I’m curious… do you not care about perjury or about steroid abuse? Which should not be illegal?
Isn’t Alger Hiss dead?
I know, we have people on the team who APPEAR dead, but standing up an actual corpse to bat would even have a lower OPS than Wille Bloomquist.
Can I get a list of offensive players who have been productive on their 43rd birthday? It just seems likely to me that a huge offensive drop off is in order whether it be injuries taking their tolls or plain old age. It just doesn’t seem like a good gamble to me based on the price tag that it will come with, because I assume we are talking about a $10M signing.
I’d be all for Bonds as DH on a 1-year deal. I couldn’t care less about the roids or alleged perjury on PURPOSEFULLY LEAKED but supposedly secret grand jury testimony.
I don’t need the media to tell me who to like and dislike.
To those folks who say they don’t care if somebody violates a bad law:
Do you people have children? Do you tell them that?? Did your parents tell you that??? Stop and think about this a little bit, people.
I will be absolutely disgusted if Roid Boy Bonds gets signed here.
I don’t want steroid freaks on the M’s.
It’s Clear He’s Not The Cream.
Please, no Bonds. The guy is toast. He’s old and has all kinds of health issues. He’s still hitting well this year, but look at other old sluggers. The end isn’t slow and gradual – it’s abrupt and painful. Next year he will be marginally useful at best. He’ll be completely done in 2008 if he is still playing.
Look at Hank Aaron, Babe Ruth, Mark McGwire, Mike Schmidt, Jeff Bagwell, Reggie Jackson, Eddie Murray, Willie Stargell, Willie McCovey, Willie Mays. I think it will be a struggle for Bonds to pass Aaron and I don’t think he’ll do it next year.
Barry Bonds would provide LH sock and would get injured immediately if signedin Seattle.
Maybe he could play CF.
I’m with Bob Montgomery on Bonds’ imminent collapse. He will not pass Aaron. I think his body will give out before he’s able to. It’s already giving out now: he’s just able to buy some time by utilizing his primadonna superstar status to take many days off and leave games early. He’s been hobbled and, athletically, a shell of himself for the last 2 years or so.
re:61
I’m with Corcoran – we could non-platoon Bonds in CF.
#23 – Joe, with all due respect, Arte has spent money, true, but he won’t pay Bonds 20 mil. He could have had Manny Ramirez (as some guy pointed out on another board) but from what I understand, he didn’t want to absorb the salary.
I doubt seriously that Arte M would pay Bonds what he thinks he’s worth anymore than the M’s or A’s will.
I really can’t believe anybody would be entertaining this? Why not spend that money on chasing a younger, more productive hitter via FA or trade?
We gripe that Krazy Carl is taking up space on our roster at the expense of younger, cheaper alternatives (and I agree with you guys 100%) but why do this? Doyle should be ready to play by midseason and if he can show some durability, he’s option #1 (unless Grover keeps sending Carl out there and his option vests, oy vey).
Correct me if I am wrong, but why would we want the headaches and the salary burden not to mention there is no way in hades that Lincoln will sign off on this.
45: Hate to rain on your parade, but Felix is pitching tonight last I heard…
#58.
Violating bad laws? Of course I would teach my children to do that. It’s part of civil disobedience. Among my hazy criteria of what makes a good American is the capacity to do what is right, whether it is legal or not, whether or not one is doomed to failure in the short run.
At the lunatic extreme of meticulously not violating bad laws you have people going to work as guards in Nazi concentration camps because they are told to and not doing so would break the law. Compare that to people going to jail because they refuse to go into the Armed Services after getting drafted because they don’t believe in that particular war.
Which of these groups of people do you propose to emulate? Choose carefully. Explain to your kids why you make that choice.
Bah, nm that, should have looked at the timestamp.
“To those folks who say they don’t care if somebody violates a bad law:
Do you people have children? Do you tell them that?? Did your parents tell you that??? Stop and think about this a little bit, people.”
Stop and think about it a little bit? I’ve thought about it for years.
Right and wrong are a thousand times more important to me than legal nad illegal. And yes, that is not too harsh a truth for children.
I don’t run my moral code by a punishment paradigm, I run it by what I thinkn it right and wrong.
There are many useless or outright bad laws on the books, I respect them not at all.
Conversely, I won’t do anything I know is wrong just because it’s legal.
Many of the greatest heroes in history became such because they vilotated bad laws. I’m all for it.
Violating a bad law is fine if it is morally necessary or morally right to do so. A German draftee soldier ordered to operate the gas chamber should have refused the order even though it was against military law to do so. A black person ordered to stop “trespassing” in a lunch counter or to sit in the back of the bus was morally right to refuse to do so, even if he or she would go to jail for that. Or a person who refuses the draft because he believes war is morally wrong.
Taking steroids is either morally neutral or morally wrong, depending on your point of view. It is not morally right, but it is clearly legally wrong.
Barry Bonds did not use steroids out of civil disobedience. He did it for his own personal glory and enrichment.
Justifying what Barry Bonds apparently did on the basis of civil disobedience is just sloppy reasoning.