Bloomquist gets more clams than hits, is caught and fined
The limit’s fifteen, and he may not get that many hits all year at this rate.
From The Olympian:
A state Fish and Wildlife officer cited Mariners utilityman Willie Bloomquist on April 21 for unlawful recreational fishing for going over the state’s limits on razor clams while he was digging at Twin Harbors, according to a citation filed in Montesano Municipal Court.
Bloomquist, 30, has paid a $50 fine after being issued the citation, a Grays Harbor District Court official said.
The ticket issued to Bloomquist does not indicate how many clams over the limit he had harvested on April 21. Fish and Wildlife spokesman Craig Bartlett said Thursday that he could not reach the officer who issued the ticket to find out how far he was over the limit.
“The catch limits and other rules are in effect to protect our resources,” Bartlett said. “The rules apply to everyone, regardless of who they are.”
And yet my favorite part of this
Mariners spokeswoman Rebecca Hale hadn’t heard of Bloomquist’s citation from Fish and Wildlife, and she had no immediate comment.
“Hi, Rebecca, I’m calling for a quick comment on a story I’m doing.”
“Yes, yes, the team’s off to a slow start, no, no one’s been fired, yes, we’re all concerned…”
“Sorry, no, I’m calling about something else.”
“What’s that?”
“Willie Bloomquist was cited and fined $50 for going over the razor clam limit.”
(long, long silence)
“I hadn’t heard that. I don’t have any comment.”
Sometimes when enjoying a bowl of clam chowder, I’ll feel a little bit of sand in the mix…making clams one of the grittiest foods out there. No wonder Bloomquist likes ‘em!
May 15th, 2008 at 8:09 pmOnly in Washington State.
May 15th, 2008 at 8:11 pmI’m pretty fond of:
“The catch limits and other rules are in effect to protect our resources,” Bartlett said. “The rules apply to everyone, regardless of who they are.”
Looks like you’re over th… wait– Baseball Superstar Willie Bloomquist!? I’m so sorry, sir, of course you’re free to go!
May 15th, 2008 at 8:15 pmOh, Gawd…imagine the limitless possibilities o’ fun with this one…
“Bad Willie, Bad Willie, whatcha gonna do…Whatcha gonna do when they come for you?”
“One clam over the line, sweet Willie, one clam over the line…”
and, of course (cuing Mike Rowe’s voice)
“The vast Grays Harbor…”
Also, wonder if the had the 50 clams on him to bail himself out?!
May 15th, 2008 at 8:22 pmFrom Geoff’s blog post from that crucial late August Angels series last year …
WFB
May 15th, 2008 at 8:36 pmSo if they all fish and hunt, what’s supposed to be the problem in the clubhouse, then? Or is it just that Baker isn’t an outdoorsman, so he doesn’t get it?
May 15th, 2008 at 8:38 pmAn odd form of veteran entitlement?
May 15th, 2008 at 8:39 pmI don’t think I’ll ever get tired of made up conversations. They are truly the gift man gives himself.
May 15th, 2008 at 8:49 pmSo he is not working on his swing, so what else is he not doing….I have to say though Razor Clams are yummy.
May 15th, 2008 at 8:55 pmAt least there is a chance of mercury poisoning.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:07 pmShame on WFB! Running around, hording all of the razor clams! And where does it get you? Now you’re down $50! You could have used that $50 to get a bum to play first base for u… wait, we already have a bum at first.
Bad Willie!
May 15th, 2008 at 9:09 pmBlazeD you crack me up.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:11 pmI think it is fitting that with so many professional athletes being tazered, pepper sprayed, driving drunk, caught in embarrasing Dirty.com photos, and fathering multiple children with multiple women, that WFB is only able to manage a fifty dollar fine from Washington State Fish and Wildlife.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:11 pmhttp://www.barrierreefaustralia.com/IMAGEGALLERY/giant-clam.jpg
He should’ve tried to catch just one of those, instead.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:15 pmFor just $1020.00 we could pitch in and buy Dave one of these to wear to a game instead of a paper bag.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:43 pmCome on guys.
If the state had its act together it would have noted that Willie is about $3 million clams over his limit.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:52 pmIts hard to belive that tonight the best thing we have for conversation is WFB poaching clams.
Bad WFB!!! Bad Poacher!!!
Plus, who the hell likes claming that much anyways? Its cold, wet and pretty much just missearble. Kind of like the watching an M’s game soaked in my own tears.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:53 pmWow, I murdered some spelling there, murdered it like WFB to clams.
May 15th, 2008 at 9:53 pmIf only he had a starting job then he wouldn’t have so much free time to over-harvest marine life.
CURSE YOU MCLAREN!! Think of the clams!
May 15th, 2008 at 10:03 pmI’m with Tek. This is the most exciting criminal behavior by a sports figure I’ve ever heard of. I’ll bet he pays ten times that in the clubhouse kangaroo court.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:04 pmThose would be some fantastic proceedings to broadcast on Court TV.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:18 pmSports Crime Awards:
May 15th, 2008 at 10:19 pmAll in favor of changing the penalty for razor clam poaching to a 120 game suspension, say “aye”.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:20 pmSorry found this one too, probably the best.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:35 pmAll in favor of changing the penalty for razor clam poaching to a 120 game suspension, say “aye”.
No way, man, there can’t possibly be any performance enhancers in those clams.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:49 pmDoes this mean he’ll be DFA’d in the near future? This doesn’t sound particularly family friendly. And can’t help with Chuck’s valiant efforts to “grow the brand” and appeal to women and children.
May 15th, 2008 at 10:54 pmHey, as a woman, nothing appeals to me more than a clam-stealer. Rugged outdoorsman. Conquest over nature. Cares nothing for the rules of petty bureaucrats. The might sportsman.
May 15th, 2008 at 11:05 pmThe unnamed Fish and Wildlife officer who could not be reached for comment reads this site.
May 15th, 2008 at 11:23 pmOr mighty sportsman.
May 15th, 2008 at 11:33 pm“Hey there, it looks like you’ve got more than fifteen razor clams in that bucket and there are two of you. Now, the thing is, you can share the shovels and all, but you have to have one bucket per person…”
May 15th, 2008 at 11:37 pm“Really? I thought as long as there was more than one of us–”
“Sure, sure, common mistake. Look, it’s no big deal, you’ve got a empty cooler there, why don’t you split–”
“Hey, are you a Mariners fan?”
“Um, what? Sure, why do you ask?”
“I’m Willie Bloomquist!”
“Oh yeah, sorry, I didn’t recognize you.”
“How about you forget about this whole thing and I get you some nice tickets…”
“Speaking of tickets, here’s yours.”
# 24
May 15th, 2008 at 11:39 pmYeah, Davenport’s nickname is the dump truck…
Maybe RRS can take him clam fishing in Queensland this off-season.
May 16th, 2008 at 12:22 amI was at the Annual 100-Person Pecan Farm Fight that year. Great fun. Shame about Ramonce’s car window, though. You hate to see a good 100-person fight in a pecan farm end that way.
May 16th, 2008 at 12:28 amWonder if he’ll have to do any community service by working the grill at Ivar’s?
May 16th, 2008 at 12:43 amRe: #5 — This is totally off topic, but [deleted, totally off topic]
May 16th, 2008 at 12:54 amI wonder if he can sing “Acres of Clams”? I wonder if we can get the video of him doing so?
I wonder if they other real fishin’ and huntin’ types in the clubhouse are going to take one look at this “poaching” incident and pull a groin laughing?
May 16th, 2008 at 12:59 amThis is the most entertaining thread all season so far…
which is kinda sad
Now perhaps WillieB can focus on baseball and leave the poor clams alone…
May 16th, 2008 at 1:00 amPS. Willie I’ll pay the fine for you if you promise to start hitting
Hey, this could inspire a movie:
FREE WILLIE!
Oh, wait…
May 16th, 2008 at 1:16 amOr, perhaps he should start poaching eggs instead!
May 16th, 2008 at 1:18 amIf ball players injure themselves carrying luggage and washing trucks–oh, wait, that one was a lie–why in the world would Willie endanger his season by digging clams? He was just asking for it–could’ve thrown his back out shoveling, cut his hand on the clam shell, stabbed himself shucking them…why the hell didn’t he, dammit?
May 16th, 2008 at 1:43 amSeriously, I thought that the team picked up Cairo so that they wouldn’t have to waste Bloomquist.
Shouldn’t Cairo have thrown himself on this grenade, Jason Ellison-like?
“It’s my fault, officer. I’m the man who dug up those clams.”
Quizzical look from the officer. “So why was your friend carrying them in?”
“Well, officer, I knew that I was over the limit. So the way I figured it, Willie was a celebrity around here, and just thought that he could carry them into town real easy-like, without any problems. I mean - it’s Willie F. Bloomquist, you know? If the man wants clams, let him have clams. That’s how I figured it.”
Officer pauses with his pen over his pad, unsure what to write. “O-kay…I’m sorry, even if this guy is a hydroplane racer, he’s still carrying the bucket, and I’m going to have to write him a ticket.”
May 16th, 2008 at 5:43 amThe Kitsap Clam?
Billy Bivalve?
The Port Orchard Poacher?
May 16th, 2008 at 7:03 amWillie doesn’t buy clams from the supermarket like other people. No, that’s for wimps.
Willie is out on the beach at dawn, with his trousers rolled up, digging in the sand with nothing but his little shovel and a pail.
That’s gritty.
May 16th, 2008 at 7:23 amThat’s the very definition of grit.
May 16th, 2008 at 7:26 amWell I’ll sleep better tonight knowing that such blatant disregard for Fish and Wildlife regulations do not go unnoticed!
May 16th, 2008 at 7:36 am42 - I am one hundred percent in support in developing a nickname for WFB based on his clamming mishap.
May 16th, 2008 at 7:40 am46 - “Digger!”
I like it. Sounds old-school sporty, with a dash of grit. Willie “Digger” Bloomquist went 0-4 today, barely missing a spectacular play on a line drive to 2nd.
May 16th, 2008 at 7:47 amInstead of ponies to cheer ourselves up, how about pictures of razor claims?
As for a nickname, Clam Poacher says it all.
May 16th, 2008 at 7:51 amIvar’s should make WFB their spokeswoman …
May 16th, 2008 at 8:07 ameverybody sing!
May 16th, 2008 at 8:15 am46 - “Digger!”
Digger is great and all, but I think Ken Digger Phelps would roll over in his grave, you know, if he were dead.
May 16th, 2008 at 8:33 amI wonder if he’ll talk to the media about it, or if he’ll clam up on them…
May 16th, 2008 at 8:42 amyou know, you’d think a big baseball star like Willie could afford a cooler rig ….
May 16th, 2008 at 8:51 amIf there’s no bread, let them eat, uh, clams!
May 16th, 2008 at 8:55 amHey, at least he’d get to hang out with the “clam girl” with the smokin’ bod!
May 16th, 2008 at 9:15 amWell, at least he wasn’t poaching geoduck, which could have led to some really tacky comments: Which one did Wee Willie want?
Although…with geoducks, we could have combined them and ponies like this.
May 16th, 2008 at 11:11 amDerek - thanks for making me laugh with the dialogue bits. You ought to be writing for a sitcom. Willie trying to bribe a Fish and Wildlife officer; ha!
May 16th, 2008 at 11:45 amThat almost sounds like the script from an episode of The Andy Griffith Show!
May 16th, 2008 at 12:19 pmWillie says it was just 2 over
May 16th, 2008 at 1:00 pmOoh…those two darn extra clams!
Showing my age here a bit from childhood road trips back East, but it’s too bad in a way that Howard Johnson’s closed down all their restaurants — Willie could’ve gone in there and got all the clams he could eat for $4.95 and saved himself that extra $45!
May 16th, 2008 at 1:23 pmclamalicious
May 16th, 2008 at 1:26 pmMSB — Quite a yummy menu!
Actually, there’s still a Howard Johnson’s diner left in Lake Placid, NY with the legendary Tendersweet(r) Fried Clams on the menu.
Maybe Willie and the boys can road trip up there in a few weeks when they go into Shea to play the Mets!
May 16th, 2008 at 2:15 pmThis is the grittiest story I have ever heard.
May 16th, 2008 at 2:44 pmUm Kenji sort of didn’t catch that?
May 16th, 2008 at 10:03 pm