Jack Needs A Metaphor Coach
When asked about Milton Bradley’s role on the 2011 Mariners, given his previous problems with Eric Wedge in Cleveland, Jack Z said this:
“That’s water over the dam,” he said. “That was several years ago. He and Eric talked since Eric got the job. They are both grown men. They are both pros. They will turn the page and move on and play baseball.”
Jack, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but water going over a dam… that means there’s flooding, the whole structure is about to break, and things are about to get real bad, real quick. What you were looking for is water under the bridge, which refers to something that is in the past and no longer relevant.
Of course, if Milton’s still got his infamous t-shirt around, water over the dam might be a more accurate projection of how this could go…
Update: Apparently, water over a dam is a synonymous idiom to water under the bridge. Apparently, I’m an idiot. Carry on, Jack.
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Haha, but at the end of the day, we all know what he meant.
In Jack’s defense, “water over the dam” has roughly the same connotation. Both refer to water that is lost and cannot be recovered – it is over and done with. I can’t give you any better source at the moment than this:
Authoritative Source
I think we can all forsee somebody getting thrown off a bridge or dam in the coming year depending on thow things go, so your point remains . .
I think what he meant was, “F*** Eric Wedge.” I’m kidding, regardless of who coaches, Milton will have an issue with him/her. As long as he decides to play baseball and hits I couldn’t care less.
Personally, “water over the dam” does sound backwards from what we all knew Jack was trying to say, even if it was spoken correctly. Who knows, maybe Jack was trying to warn us for the future. Though, after Milton came back from his mental collapse, even though it wasn’t for the whole season, he seemed to be a much better teammate. Almost too good… if that is possible. Truthfully, I like Milton and I hope he can stay healthy and help this team be (at least) competitive. But honestly I’m just excited to see the youngins develop. Ackley is killing the ball right now!
Well, with Bradley we all know he’s a few bricks short of a full deck. But if Wedge can keep Milton’s nose on the prize and his ear to the wind, I’m sure everyone will be happy as an oyster.
The main reason this sounds funny to us these days, I think, is that our big hydroelectric dams in the West don’t have spillways over the top anymore (or at any rate don’t normally use them) — they have channels down through the middle of the dam that power generators. Old-style dams, once the water level backed up to the top of the dam, the excess went over the top, through a channel designed to control the flow. It was as natural as, well, water going under a bridge.
I could be wrong, but I suspect this expression sounds a lot more normal to an Easterner like Jack than to someone who’s lived most of their life out West.
It’s like the levee breaking. Forgeddaboutit, it’s old news.
Metaphors is a 200 level class. He needs the intro course, Simile School.
You can’t be more of an idiot than Steve Phillips, who recently suggested Jack Z. should trade Justin Smoak to Milwaukee for Prince Fielder.
A better metaphor would be “It’s all turds down the toilet.”
Actually our hydroelectric projects in the Northwest also pass water at places other than through the turbines that generate electricity. Not that energy sellers or Columbia River shippers care for that occurence. The issue of “spill” as it’s called when water is passed through or over the Columbia Dams but not through the turbines is extremely controversial and politically explosive in the management of Columbia River salmon.
For that matter, most diversion-works type dams, including the one that controls Seattle’s water supply have “tucking” gates that allow water to be passed over the dam for myriad reasons.
All that said, I agree with your original premise as “water under the bridge” is a far better metaphor.
That’s about as funny as a screen door on a battleship.
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall?
“Dam”
Well, sure, but diverting water into sluice-ways is a tad different from having water overtop the dam. I mean, how comfortable would the folks in Auburn, Kent, Tukwila, or Renton feel if FEMA or Army Corps of Engineers officials started belittling their concerns by saying it was all just “water over the (Howard Hanson) Dam”?
I don’t think it matters so much since Milton’s career is already “water over the hill”.
But a do have a good question. If Wedge had been our coach last year, and Figgy attacked him in the dug out, how do you think Wedgy would have dealt with the problem? Do you think he would at least get grounded for a day or two?
greentunic,
That just absolutely made my day. I am still laughing about that I don’t know why. I’ve never heard that before.
Of course you can also ask if it would even have got to that point. The dynamic in the dugout is a complicated thing that can be radically altered by minor changes — much less something as fundamental as the identity of the manager — and I don’t think any of us have anything but the vaguest insight into it. For that matter, I’m not sure even the guys on last year’s roster can answer your hypothetical question.
I would advise that someone in the FO buy Jack a copy of I’ve Never Metaphor I Didn’t Like.