WBC sensation Snelling signs with Padres

DMZ · March 14, 2009 at 2:52 pm · Filed Under Mariners 

Hated rival Padres sign former Mariner! Snelling vows “great vengeance, furious justice” during June games.

Move comes as tickets for the June 23-25th series at Safeco Field become available! USSM event frantically planned!

Seriously, good for Chris, good for the Padres, may this be the season he goes nuts on the league.

Comments

36 Responses to “WBC sensation Snelling signs with Padres”

  1. JH on March 14th, 2009 3:04 pm

    Ceiling?

  2. Colm on March 14th, 2009 3:20 pm

    Yeah, ceiling? Did you phone this one in?

  3. Colm on March 14th, 2009 3:23 pm

    and on the meat of the article. Yaay Doyle. Keep on keepin’ on. He’ll be a nice hitter if he can only stay healthy. (If we were a soccer player he’d make Darren ‘Sicknote’ Anderton look like Billy Bremner; I can’t think of the appropriate baseball analogy).

  4. Colm on March 14th, 2009 3:25 pm

    Oh, okay, after giving it a moment’s thought, he makes Pokey Reese look like Cal Ripken.

    But they’re both shortstops. Can anyone improve on this?

  5. etowncoug on March 14th, 2009 3:41 pm

    Everyone on this site knows that there is no way that Doyle is healthy for the June 23-25 series.

  6. Colm on March 14th, 2009 3:43 pm

    But we wish he could be!

  7. ChrisB on March 14th, 2009 3:44 pm

    Nice Spurs reference Colm!

  8. DMZ on March 14th, 2009 3:48 pm

    etowncoug: fuck you!

  9. DMZ on March 14th, 2009 4:04 pm

    That sounds more hostile and less chipper than I meant it.

    I’ve never understood why every Snelling post seems to get people who want to crap on it, though. We’ve admitted we’re relentless, irrational fans. It’s part of the USSM package.

    I particularly find it frustrating that we get so much criticism and mockery for being robots but whenever we do stuff that’s clearly fun, emotional, and especially when it reflects our appreciation of a player or the game, people come out of the woodwork to be jerks about it.

  10. Jeff Nye on March 14th, 2009 4:23 pm

    Curse you, Padres!

  11. Colm on March 14th, 2009 4:28 pm

    Sorry for being a Debbie Downer. I just think “Sicknote” is one of the funnier nicknames I’ve heard in sport. I hope Snelling can stay healthy long enough to show more fans the value in his hitting.

    How would he profile as DH?

  12. Colm on March 14th, 2009 4:29 pm

    I take it you invented the “great vengeance, furious justice” quote, no?

    It would be pretty darn funny if it were verbatim.

  13. DMZ on March 14th, 2009 4:35 pm

    yeah. Unfortunately there don’t seem to be quotes available. I’m sure if someone asked him about it he’d say something twice as cool (though whether they’d quote him or just put “I’m excited to have a chance to contribute…” or whatever is never certain).

  14. xxtinynickxx on March 14th, 2009 4:37 pm

    Im very happy for him! Maybe the Mariners will deal for him if an injury bug hits. Always seems like the padres and mariners make good partners in the world of trades haha.

  15. Crushgroovin on March 14th, 2009 5:43 pm

    CRAP anyone but the Padres. I like many other M’s fans have a deeded hatred for the Padres that has been handed down father to son over many generations. Cursed Padres and their darn stuff that I don’t like about them which I can’t recall but I know I hate them. I just can’t wait to see the M’s stomp them back into the stone age.

  16. JLP on March 14th, 2009 7:48 pm

    Curse you, Padres!

    You forgot your fist shake.

  17. ppl on March 14th, 2009 7:48 pm

    Congrats to Chris Snelling and best wishes for 2009 in San Diego. May there be Excellent health and resounding success with 600+ plate appearances waiting there for you. Hopefully, when I look at the National League batting leaders I will see – Snelling, S.D. among them all season.

  18. Mike Honcho on March 14th, 2009 7:58 pm

    It might do Snelling some good to lose about 20 pounds. He looks awfully big…

  19. JLP on March 14th, 2009 8:02 pm

    I’m sure most of that will come off with some playing time and exercise during practice.

  20. drjeff on March 14th, 2009 8:03 pm

    I do love Doyle. Is there any indication that he has an idea of just how adored he is by the USSM faithful? We lustily screamed “DOYYYYYLE” at a Beavers-Rainiers game a couple seasons back, but I never had a chance to tell him that there were legions of blog-followers rooting him to Cooperstown.

  21. joser on March 14th, 2009 9:26 pm

    How would he profile as DH?

    He’s pretty much the perfect National League DH. The archtype. The acme. The ne plus ultra.

    Trust the Padres not to know which league they’re in.

    But hey, when they play in Seattle as part of the hated rivals week, he’ll be in his natural position. (And those of you who immediately thought: “Yeah, his natural position: on the DL”… shame on you)

  22. mikeym on March 15th, 2009 1:36 am

    Since I heard about this I, like many others, been trying to reconcile the emotions that come with our beloved Doyle now being a Hated Rival. I want to wish him all success, but the passion of the rivalry runs so deep…

  23. joser on March 15th, 2009 6:43 am

    At least it wasn’t the Royals. Adding Doyle could be enough for them to conclusively win the battle of grass creek…for this season anyway.

  24. JerBear on March 15th, 2009 10:25 am

    From the official release on The Padres site…

    He was a favorite of then-Seattle manager Lou Piniella in 2002 and became a fan favorite in Seattle, gaining something of a cult following from fans that chose to refer to him by his middle name (Doyle) so to avoid cursing him into another injury.

    Nice. 🙂

  25. Bob Kayline on March 15th, 2009 11:47 am

    Doyle may be like the 1940s Dodger outfielder, Pete Reiser, who repeatedly injured himself crashing into walls. Leo Durocher said, “Willie Mays had everything. Pete Reiser had everything but luck.”

  26. scott19 on March 15th, 2009 11:52 am

    And we were just wondering the other day why he hadn’t gotten a look from the Hated Friars yet…

    Sounds like there’s a USSM aficionado somewhere in SD’s front office. 🙂

  27. msb on March 15th, 2009 11:53 am

    From the official release on The Padres site…

    the much-missed Corey Brock

  28. scott19 on March 15th, 2009 12:04 pm

    The acme.

    Though, hopefully, not the same “Acme” as those horrid products which Wile E. Coyote kept getting jinxed by in the old WB cartoons.

  29. msb on March 15th, 2009 12:17 pm

    Mar 19 vs SD
    7:05 PM
    FSN / MLB.TV

  30. joser on March 15th, 2009 12:25 pm

    Well that Acme got sued, though I’m not sure if they’re still tied up in court or not.

    If they’re still in business, and Doyle has been using their products (“Acmeâ„¢ EverStop Cleats”; “Acmeâ„¢ Rocket-Assisted Bat”), it certainly might explain his injury history.

  31. scott19 on March 15th, 2009 1:35 pm

    Thanks, Joser…those were freaking hilarious!

    As Artie Lange once remarked of Acme, they were “the sh**tiest products ever”. 🙂

  32. Kazinski on March 15th, 2009 3:00 pm

    I’m glad to see Doyle sign with the Padres, at least that way we’ll get a chance to see him every year.

    Hopefully in about 15 years at the end of his career he can come back to the Mariners for his final season so he can feel the love.

  33. Evan on March 15th, 2009 5:55 pm

    It might do Snelling some good to lose about 20 pounds. He looks awfully big…

    It’s padding, to protect his fragile frame.

  34. MKT on March 16th, 2009 10:58 am

    I particularly find it frustrating that we get so much criticism and mockery for being robots but whenever we do stuff that’s clearly fun, emotional, and especially when it reflects our appreciation of a player or the game, people come out of the woodwork to be jerks about it.

    I’m not sure which post(s) you are refering to, but this, and certainly DMZ’s preceding post, seemed to have been directed at etowncoug’s post, which I did not find to be jerky at all. In fact I think it was written in the spirit of being “clearly fun” and “emotional”. Bemoaning Snelling’s injury prone-ness is an ongoing activity/joke at this site, right down to the “Doyle” business. Calling him “Doyle” isn’t being a jerk, and neither IMO was etowncoug’s post.

  35. Breadbaker on March 17th, 2009 6:29 am

    The date to circle on your calendar then is April 17, Padres at Phillies, when presumably Doyle will be presented with his World Series ring. And the happiest guy will be the clubhouse attendant who won’t have to figure out how to get it through Australian customs.

  36. JerBear on March 17th, 2009 7:46 am

    the much-missed Corey Brock

    Yeah, I noticed that after the fact. He’s got another good article up now.

    He called Ussmariner “perspicacious.” I had to look it up.

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